I turned 30 this past May. To help me celebrate my 30th, this three-part series brings you 30 "ism's," or life lessons, I've picked up during my 30 years on this planet.
You can check out the first post here. The second part of this series brings you some additional musings and thoughts. Let me know your thoughts in the comment section below!
"T'ism's" 11 - 20 (Part II)
1. F*ck Losing — Losing to me, is the worst thing on the planet. Beach volleyball, a friendly game of Monopoly, whatever — my competitive nature always gets in the way of just enjoying the game. I HATE LOSING . During those unfortunate (and rare 😜) times that I DO lose, Kanye-level petty thoughts are running through my head (not that bad, but almost).
What I've learned by 30, is that losing has value because it teaches you: when you remember the taste of defeat, you’re more likely to avoid it the next time around. I’d even go as far as to argue that during my toughest L’s, those times where I embraced the lesson learned early, rather than focusing on the loss itself, have made me stronger.
2. Challenge Yourself - I’m a big believer in the value of challenging yourself… how else do you get better? Fear is to blame for not having the courage to face life’s bigger challenges, whether it be organizing your finances, dropping a couple of pounds, or in my case, figuring out how to do this every once in a while on the basketball court. Is it going to be hard? Hell yeah! But that’s what separates the greats from the not-so-greats: embracing what it means to be uncomfortable. If you’re comfortable, you ain’t getting better… and that’s the bottom line, because Stone Cold T said so.
3. Be Aware of the Future, But Don’t Focus On It — The future is scary as hell! What’s never good though, is spending so much time thinking about it that you miss what’s in front of your face. Appreciate today while planning for tomorrow; anything can happen between now and then.
4. Be On Time, Damn It! — I’m sure somewhere, my friends, family, co-workers, and acquaintances are all collectively laughing at the thought of me giving advice on being on time. They wouldn’t be wrong: I’m always late, which I’m working on. Being on time is a sign of respect. If you’re constantly late, figure out tricks to organize your day. Or, just stop doing so much.
5. Power Down - This is a new one for me, but putting down the phone, turning off the TV, and leaving my laptop closed are all new opportunities for developing mindfulness. Technology is AWESOME, and I love it, but the constant images, information, and communication can get pretty draining. Doing something that doesn’t involve a screen is a good way to seek balance.
6. Build Credibility by Following Through — I’ve learned that nothing matters more than consistency: with my relationships, my work, and achieving my goals, nothing has been more important than committing to my word. Credibility is something that’s earned, and never guaranteed. I recommend at all stages of life, make sure you know exactly what you’re getting into before committing to something: if the juice isn’t worth the squeeze, find something that you’re more likely to achieve and start there.
7. Learn to Be Content, Because There’s No Finish Line at the End — I love achieving goals because I love the satisfaction of accomplishment: getting sh*t done is hard, but that 30 seconds of satisfaction when you achieve a goal is like a drug to me. Be careful though, because ultimately, you end up competing against yourself, all the time. Find a way to balance contentment and appreciation with achievement and drive.
8. No Ego’s — I don’t have a HUGE ego, but let’s just say I do enjoy my own company, which is a good thing! Being confident is important. Moments when I’ve been able to put my ego aside and listen, have been the greatest life teachers. Ego’s are appropriate when you need to figure out a way to get out your vision and don’t have a lot of support: be confident in what you’re trying to do; but never allow your ego to prevent you from listening. Listening > Talking.
9. Get Your Car Washed: Come on, son.
10. Pick Up the Check — Sometimes, It’s just the right thing to do. If you’re broke, order less, and let someone else eat better, on you. No alligator arms.